How often do you take rest breaks? True rest breaks?
I’ll admit, many times I push myself to the limit, then collapse for days (okay, sometimes its weeks of doing the bare minimum before I recover). That’s, um, not good!
I’m reading a book called 18 Minutes: Find Your Focus, Master Distraction, and Get the Right Things Done by Peter Bregman. He proposes that breaks should be more of a “ritual of self-imposed brief and strategic interruptions.” This is a concept that I almost can’t wrap my head around!
He calls them regular rest stops. I understand in theory, but I’m not sure how “I” would do it. How do I not push from one project to the next while I still have momentum? Or do I run out of momentum because I push myself too hard?
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this!
I’m honestly baffled about how to get some momentum with Secrets of Thornbury Woods Book 2. I love the idea and characters, but I’m having trouble finding my rhythm (wink) with the edits.
Never fear. My author friends are encouraging me with sprints and ideas—and hopefully I’ll step into the flow soon.
We’ve even started brainstorming Book 3!! I’m very excited about that.
Let me know how your summer is going. How are you creating breaks in the summer heat?
This month in my newsletter I am featuring Michael Korvello, guitarist of Solar Uprising, and the hero of FINDING HER RHYTHM. You can subscribe to my newsletters for these character interviews at the link below.
Remember: FINDING HER RHYTHM is free on ALL retailers. And for the month of AUGUST book 2, SETTLING THE SCORE, is on sale for $1.99.
Find out what happens between Daniel and Becca, the only woman he's truly wanted. Download it today!
Amazon
BNN
Kobo
iBooks
Add it to your TBR shelf on Goodreads
I’m reading a book called 18 Minutes: Find Your Focus, Master Distraction, and Get the Right Things Done by Peter Bregman. He proposes that breaks should be more of a “ritual of self-imposed brief and strategic interruptions.” This is a concept that I almost can’t wrap my head around!
He calls them regular rest stops. I understand in theory, but I’m not sure how “I” would do it. How do I not push from one project to the next while I still have momentum? Or do I run out of momentum because I push myself too hard?
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this!
I’m honestly baffled about how to get some momentum with Secrets of Thornbury Woods Book 2. I love the idea and characters, but I’m having trouble finding my rhythm (wink) with the edits.
Never fear. My author friends are encouraging me with sprints and ideas—and hopefully I’ll step into the flow soon.
We’ve even started brainstorming Book 3!! I’m very excited about that.
Let me know how your summer is going. How are you creating breaks in the summer heat?
Sale Starts Today!
This month in my newsletter I am featuring Michael Korvello, guitarist of Solar Uprising, and the hero of FINDING HER RHYTHM. You can subscribe to my newsletters for these character interviews at the link below.
Remember: FINDING HER RHYTHM is free on ALL retailers. And for the month of AUGUST book 2, SETTLING THE SCORE, is on sale for $1.99.
Find out what happens between Daniel and Becca, the only woman he's truly wanted. Download it today!
Amazon
BNN
Kobo
iBooks
Add it to your TBR shelf on Goodreads Wading Through Life…
It’s spring here in the South. Everyone focuses on the new flowers, but it can be a mix here with severe thunderstorms and tornadoes thrown around every couple of weeks. This year, as my daughter and I prepare for another round of “can we actually grow something—for real”, I find myself fascinated by all the seeds she’s bought. She’s so excited by the potential of their growth and what will happen as they come to fruition.Something that caught my eye…
Wading Through Life...
As the song says, life can be hard sometimes. Doing things is hard sometimes. Believe it or not, even words are hard sometimes. Many of us start out the new year wanting (sometimes desperately) to make changes in our lives. Myself included! But change is hard. This past November, I found a key that helped me accomplish a goal. It still wasn’t easy, but it was easier. I went from not writing at all to getting in several writing sprints per day. The key? Accountability. I asked a few fellow authors who were participating in the same monthly challenge as me if they wanted to start a small accountability group. Just post your goals and chick in daily. That’s all. We would hold each other accountable to work towards our goals, offer encouragement, celebrate our wins, and help find solutions to struggles.
Guess what? It worked! And so did I!!
After all, I’d be horribly embarrassed if I failed completely. That got me through the first few days. Then I was encouraged by the response and progress of my fellow authors. The writing got easier (most days), and I found myself looking forward to posting my progress each day.
I mean, I wasn’t perfect. I didn’t write every single day, because…life. Right? But in just 30 days, I got a hell of a lot more done than in the previous 6 months.
December came. The challenge ended. I stopped posting and—bam! No more words.
Suddenly all the other stuff on my plate became more important, more urgent, more—well—noticeable if it wasn’t done. More noticeable than the writing.
But I have a book I want to finish. Editing to accomplish. I have a series I want to publish this year.
I could struggle alone, or ask for some accountability!
So a small group of authors are joining me this year to Get Some Shit Done!
I believe this is part of creating good goals that can actually come to fruition. Most people have this idea that they have to do it all themselves. I don’t know why we feel this way. All work is easier if you have a helping hand.
Look at the obstacles and put a system in place that will help you take the steps. It will be so much easier! Whether its an exercise partner, or an in-person class to learn the thing you’ve been trying alone for the longest time, or a weekly meeting to give your family a time and place to decide on meals for the week.
What are your goals for this year? Do you have a plan to accomplish them?
I'd love to hear from you!
Dani
It Caught My Eye...
I've had stairs on my mind lately. A stairwell plays a prominent place in my current work-in-progress (WIP) as the location of a very tragic event, an event that the heroine is reminded of every time she has to pass or use this staircase in the house. It makes the home a very emotional place for her. What should be a beautiful centerpiece as you enter a home is transformed into a reminder of grief and tragedy.
Wading Through Life...
In my day job, I’ve always worked at full throttle. I’ve always been expected to. A To Do list a mile long and constant questions and interruptions. Someone always looking over your shoulder, judging. And I was raised to believe meeting this challenge was a sign of a hard worker. Complaining would be a sign of laziness. Sometimes that busy pace helped the day go quicker; some days, not so much… Recent changes mean that I’m currently in a slower time. How long that will last remains to be seen. But for now, my days at my new job are happening at a much slower pace. Great, right? Not always. I think our brains can get used to that fast pace and pushing to keep up. Even while you know it isn’t good for you and not a healthy way of operating 24/7. I know I had begun to have difficulty powering down at night. Or I would shut down to complete inactivity (which should have been a huge sign to me that something wasn’t right.) My new job is slower paced, but the restless, anxious, “I must be wrong because every second isn’t packed with something waiting” feeling won’t go away. That’s when I realized…I don’t know how to downshift. Everyone tells you to just breathe>>but I don’t actually know how. 😊 It isn’t just a matter of getting your body to slow down (i.e. stop running on adrenaline). The problem is the BRAIN. It feels like if I just exited an 80 mph interstate and found myself on a 30 mph backroad. My brain keeps searching for the speed, even though it’s no longer necessary.
I know a lot of people view this as a good problem to have—me included—but its not one I’ve encountered before.
Creativity requires a slower, meandering mindset, like a Sunday drive…until it latches on to the idea it wants to pursue. But I think its easier when you start from the more exploratory mindset.
But I haven’t been on that easy back road on a daily basis in years. Even writing retreats, when I was able to have them, required some time to get back into a slower mindset.
So now I’m brainstorming some ways to get my brain to slow down on the regular. I want to boost the environment that will in turn encourage my creativity. But I believe it will take some training! Here's some ideas:
- Schedule in some daydreaming time. I find myself constantly searching for something to distract me—SM, music, something to read—not good! I think some “thinking time” is in order, even if I can only do 5 minutes at a time.
- Walking in nature—I’m hoping the weather cools soon so I can do this.
- Journal—I used to call this a “brain dump”. It often helps me to get racing thoughts out of my brain. I need to do this more often!
- Cut down on communicating—my environment has allowed me to already do this. Less emails, calls, people coming by.
- Lower consumption of TV, internet, etc. Also doing this. No wifi access at work, so less lunchtime binging.
- Relaxation activities, like meditation, breathing. Already doing this, but working to ramp it up.
- Distract myself with something fun, like trip planning (see last blog for more on this) or getting together with friends or planning regular date nights.
Wading Through Life...
Party Planning has begun! At least, a party for 2! No, not that kind…I’m knee deep in planning a girls’ weekend with my daughter. At the end of the month, we will be immersing ourselves in the history, beauty, and spooky atmosphere that is Salem, MA. I’m sure y’all will hear more than you ever wanted to know about my trip. 😊 Lots of pics and musings about that in the near future.
In the meantime, I want to talk about planning and mental health. I’m not sure if its my writer's imagination or just my natural planning nature (I’m a planner girl through and through!), but the excitement is kicked up a notch when I’m planning something that’s actually fun.
Maybe this is obvious to everyone else, but for a long time I’ve been immersed in the minutiae of my weekly schedule. Chores, work schedule, appointments, and all kinds of tasks…none of it FUN.
Pssstttt…. I’m not really good at planning enjoyable things for myself. Just the details of life that need to be organized and taken care of…
But looking at the possibilities for this trip (things to do, places to eat, what we will see) and my excitement has been a big boost to my mental health. I have something to look forward to, daydream about, and enjoy the thought of.
Those things that give you that kick of excitement and energy you don’t get from the daily grind.
I’d forgotten that.
Which means I need to start planning more fun things for myself! Uh oh. I’m not a natural in this arena (see whole explanation above…). 😊
I may need some help here. What are your favorite plans to look forward to? Big ones like trips? Small ones like a date night?
I’d love to hear your suggestions!
Take care,
Dani
Haunted Heritage
It's almost time for Spooky Season! My favorite time of year. Here's one of my Secrets of Covington Corner novellas to get you in the appropriate spooky mood!
She’d prepared to be flooded in during the storm, alone…she didn’t plan on being stranded in a haunted house with him.
With an antebellum home to protect, Olivia doesn’t waste any time in her preparations. She’d promised her employer she would take care of the place while she was in the hospital. No power and no exit route is par for the course this far from town.
But her plans didn’t include a sexy PI who seems intent on digging into her employer’s every secret. Isolated by rising flood waters, Olivia can’t get away from his questions or the heated attraction he evokes. Still she can’t shake the feeling he’s hiding something.
Will the old trunk in the attic reveal a new kind of storm? Will his investigation into a long lost heir destroy the very love they’ve both been longing for? Find out HERE!
Novellas in Secrets of Covington Corner series in order:
Shadow Manor
Haunted Heritage
Dark Destiny
Holiday Storm
It Caught My Eye...
I'm so ready for Fall! It just started cooling down here in the South, but I know better than to trust it. We will have second summer soon. I'm just praying for more than 2 weeks of autumn's cool breezes before winter kicks in...
Author Joanna Penn talks about the different types of energy authors use – “starting energy”, “pushing through energy”, and “finishing energy”.** This final one is the push to get a project completed, to see that story through to the very end. Usually it is fueled by the momentum that has built up during your project and the rush to see your story wrap up.
I’m full tilt in finishing energy right now, and its both satisfying and exhausting. Normally I find it exciting to push to the end of a story, but my current energy is also muddled by everything else going on in my life. Finishing up at my old job... That meant (for me) wrapping up any outstanding tasks, trying to proactively cover anything that might come up while there’s no one there to do my job, leave instructions behind, and clean out my office (on top of the emotional energy of closing out this chapter of my life).
And now learning my new job. Yes, my expectations of myself are a little high…
But I’m trying to focus o the joy of setting all of that chaos aside for a few hours so I can explore this adventure with my characters. Not easy, but oh so fun!
What story are you enjoying to escape your work load today?
Take Care,
Dani
** More on different energies in the book writing process from Joanna here: https://www.thecreativepenn.com/starting-but-not-finishing-writing-projects/
She’d watched him from afar for years…now he’s up close and personal.
Shy librarian Cara spent her life overshadowed by her three older brothers, while secretly crushing on their best friend. After a family tragedy, he cut himself out of their lives, but she still watches his house on the hill from the darkness of her bedroom every night.
Then she gets a second chance to reveal the man behind the mask. A night of revelry leads to passion and high hopes, until her tortured hero’s troubled past rises from the shadows.
Will he retreat into the darkness once more or let obsession lead him to her love
Novellas in Secrets of Covington Corner series in order:
Shadow Manor
Haunted Heritage
Dark Destiny
Holiday Storm
Amazon
B&N
Apple Books
Kobo
Add to your TBR Shelf in Goodreads
Only Have Time for a Short Read?
Check out my novella series set in Covington Corner...starting with Book One for FREE.
She’d watched him from afar for years…now he’s up close and personal.
Shy librarian Cara spent her life overshadowed by her three older brothers, while secretly crushing on their best friend. After a family tragedy, he cut himself out of their lives, but she still watches his house on the hill from the darkness of her bedroom every night.
Then she gets a second chance to reveal the man behind the mask. A night of revelry leads to passion and high hopes, until her tortured hero’s troubled past rises from the shadows.
Will he retreat into the darkness once more or let obsession lead him to her love
Novellas in Secrets of Covington Corner series in order:
Shadow Manor
Haunted Heritage
Dark Destiny
Holiday Storm
Amazon
B&N
Apple Books
Kobo
Add to your TBR Shelf in Goodreads
It Caught My Eye…
My daughter and I are headed to Salem, MA in a few weeks and I'm knee deep in deciding what we will see while we're there. Yay!!
Change is inevitable, someone said, but if I’m honest, it’s my least favorite thing in the world.
I like comfortable, cozy, familiar. Change feels like an itchy wool sweater, only I have to wear it 24/7. Even good change is difficult, because my body/brain doesn’t know the difference between happy stress and difficult time stress. I’ve officially dubbed this season the “Summer of Change”. I thought it would start and end with my children’s graduation (one from college, the other from high school), and the youngest one starting college in the fall. This is a bittersweet season for us. While I’m excited to see my babies find their wings, and they aren’t completely leaving the nest because it takes time to get established as an adult, it’s still the realization that they no longer need us as much anymore, and they’re becoming their own independent selves. I certainly hope that they find a sure footing as they move forward, and happy, healthy lives, doing things that they love.
But with the oldest moved home, unexpected medical issues (not me), unexpected feline medical issues, getting everything set up for son’s college start, house painting project…and the big one—an upcoming job change for me.
That’s right. After this month, I’ll no longer be working at the university. It’s good (more money, less stress, great company). It’s sad (I’ve loved working on campus and am going to miss so much about it, including a lot of the people). It’s hectic (lots of paperwork, arrangements, forms, appointments, etc).
Big change…and my body is super stressed. Enough I’m not sleeping. Ugh! Hate it when that happens!
But one YAY factor? I’m using the deadline of starting the new job to motivate me to push to finish the book I’m working on. Learning a new job will require brain power, not to mention getting used to a new environment. I can probably edit, but not write new words (author brain is weird!).
This weekend is my first big push. I’ve got 2 more to finish the last 3rd of the first draft. Fingers crossed I can jump that hurdle for a fast finish!
Have you faced any major changes lately? I'd love to talk about it over on my Facebook author page! Follow me at: https://www.facebook.com/dani.Love Small-Town Suspense? Try my Small Town Secrets series!
BENEATH THE SURFACE is FREE on all platforms!It Caught My Eye...
As you know, we have a whole clowder of cats in our house, but we only have one outside cat. Her name is Ghost. My daughter caught this awesome picture of her this week and I just love it! I hope you do too!
Remember when you were a kid...the holidays seemed to hold such magic. You only had to work on the fun decorations, go to the parties, and never had to worry about clean-up. I have a feeling that's why some of the magic disappears from the holidays as we get older.
Now we know what it's like to have to prepare, buy, budget, and put everything away afterwards. Even though we are creating magic for others, it carries a lot of weight with it.
Which makes a good book even better! At least for a little while, we can lose ourselves in the magic of other worlds, mystery, and romance...and forget the hectic preparations for a few precious minutes. In fact, I'd argue that it's necessary to keep our own magic high in order to pass it along! I'd love to hear what story you are indulging in this holiday season!
Take care,
Dani
Which makes a good book even better! At least for a little while, we can lose ourselves in the magic of other worlds, mystery, and romance...and forget the hectic preparations for a few precious minutes. In fact, I'd argue that it's necessary to keep our own magic high in order to pass it along! I'd love to hear what story you are indulging in this holiday season!
Take care,
Dani
Indulge in a Gothic Holiday story with the conclusion of my Covington Corner series, Holiday Storm.
As her boss, he’d made her life miserable for years. Now she’s snowed in with him for the holidays…with access to the secrets he’s been hiding from her. Piper Waverly’s boss demands she collect a contract from his house during a snowstorm on Christmas Eve…that is his frustrating M.O., even if he is a sexy former rock star. What she didn’t expect was to spend Christmas at his isolated mountain retreat—just the two of them. But seclusion with the thorn-in-her-side has some surprising benefits. Her arch nemesis shows a surprisingly sensual side that draws her. She is also able to pry into the side of his life he’s hidden from her for so long. Tantalizing…until his secrets hit too close to home. Does the hidden room in his house hold the key to her family tragedy? Has he always been closer than she thought? Will her newfound love withstand the coming storm? Read the entire Secrets of Covington Corner novella series: Shadow Manor Haunted Heritage Dark Destiny Shadow Manor Amazon Barnes & Noble Kobo Apple Books
It’s hard to feel inspired and connect to creativity during hard times. We’ve all seen that in the past year. But it’s just as hard during busy or chaotic times when other things in your life have to take precedence.
Combine the two and being creative can be nigh to impossible.
I haven’t posted about this a lot because I hate to be all “doom and gloom” for y’all (that would expose my natural Eeyore tendencies a little too much!). Besides, we’ve got enough of that going on every day.
But I’ve definitely struggled with my depression, doing two positions for the price of one at the day job, health issues, and renovating our garage over the last year. I’ve completely lost touch with my creative side and words are ephemeral right now.
As we move into the fall season in the US, I find myself longing for that connection once more and the chance to rejuvenate my creativity. But this takes purposeful choices (I know this from past experience).
Here are a few of the choices I’m making right now. Hopefully by sharing I can inspire you to reconnect with your creative, dreaming side too.
**Rest
Yes, this is the opposite of doing something, but it is a choice to be made.
I’m not just talking about sleep (though I personally love a nap!), but just slowing down, reducing the number of obligations I have, letting my mind wander, and leaving time in my life unplanned.
**Cleaning
What?!?!
I know y’all think I’m crazy, but this is totally true for me. When life gets hectic, my house/office/car/yard gets totally cluttered!
It’s hard to relax with all that stuff staring me in the face. While I don’t have time for a major declutter, working on some “hot spots” definitely helps with my mood and feeling like I have at least some control in the midst of chaos.
**Explore/Discovery
This is more about refilling my well and awakening my curiosity than actually accomplishing something (a big driver in my day-to-day activities). For me, this can be an intellectual pursuit like reading articles about subjects I want to learn more about or just watching videos about random stuff (I have a morbid fascination with creepy/scary/tragic things so will sometimes binge Youtube channels like Ask a Mortician).
But it’s also about physically exploring! Personally I like to get out in nature, whether its walking on campus or hiking nearby trails. But this might also mean wandering a local craft store, meandering through an antique mall, or braving a new restaurant.
**Pampering myself
I hesitate to call this “self-care” because all of the pursuits in this blog fall under that label for me. But I am trying to purposefully make time to do things I love that make me feel good right then, that I don’t often make time for!
A long soak in a hot bath. A night with the family around the fire pit roasting marshmallows. Putting out my seasonal decorations. Puttering around in my flower beds. Yes, I actually have to give myself permission to do something that’s fun, that doesn’t normally fall on my To Do list.
There are other things I’m working toward, like giving myself permission to just brainstorm, writing long hand, researching my story/characters without putting pressure on myself to log in words…but those are specific to my writing practice. While I long to put words on the page once more, I want to reawaken the creative side of my whole being!
I hope this was inspiring to you if you also struggle, or at least gave you some insight into my process as a creative. I’d love to hear how you reconnect with your creative side during trying times. Comment below or send me an email with your tips!
Take care,
Dani
readdaniwade@gmail.com
**Rest
Yes, this is the opposite of doing something, but it is a choice to be made.
I’m not just talking about sleep (though I personally love a nap!), but just slowing down, reducing the number of obligations I have, letting my mind wander, and leaving time in my life unplanned.
**Cleaning
What?!?!
I know y’all think I’m crazy, but this is totally true for me. When life gets hectic, my house/office/car/yard gets totally cluttered!
It’s hard to relax with all that stuff staring me in the face. While I don’t have time for a major declutter, working on some “hot spots” definitely helps with my mood and feeling like I have at least some control in the midst of chaos.
**Explore/Discovery
This is more about refilling my well and awakening my curiosity than actually accomplishing something (a big driver in my day-to-day activities). For me, this can be an intellectual pursuit like reading articles about subjects I want to learn more about or just watching videos about random stuff (I have a morbid fascination with creepy/scary/tragic things so will sometimes binge Youtube channels like Ask a Mortician).
But it’s also about physically exploring! Personally I like to get out in nature, whether its walking on campus or hiking nearby trails. But this might also mean wandering a local craft store, meandering through an antique mall, or braving a new restaurant.
**Pampering myself
I hesitate to call this “self-care” because all of the pursuits in this blog fall under that label for me. But I am trying to purposefully make time to do things I love that make me feel good right then, that I don’t often make time for!
A long soak in a hot bath. A night with the family around the fire pit roasting marshmallows. Putting out my seasonal decorations. Puttering around in my flower beds. Yes, I actually have to give myself permission to do something that’s fun, that doesn’t normally fall on my To Do list.
There are other things I’m working toward, like giving myself permission to just brainstorm, writing long hand, researching my story/characters without putting pressure on myself to log in words…but those are specific to my writing practice. While I long to put words on the page once more, I want to reawaken the creative side of my whole being!
I hope this was inspiring to you if you also struggle, or at least gave you some insight into my process as a creative. I’d love to hear how you reconnect with your creative side during trying times. Comment below or send me an email with your tips!
Take care,
Dani
readdaniwade@gmail.com
Over Christmas break, my day job closes for 10 days. Most years, that’s catch-up and family time, but this year, I was determined it would be a true rest for me. The pandemic has created a lot of mental overwhelm for me and I knew, going into the new year, that I needed to step back from everything and just hibernate for a while. Focus on me, sleep, and time with my family.
For once, that’s actually what I did! (I know, all of my fellow achievers are just as shocked as I am…)
I spent a lot of time planning (which is both helpful and crafty…I decorate spreads on my Passion Planner that I use to track goals throughout the year). Reading. Journaling. Cooking…and starting a new art journal.
Wait…what?
Do
Yes, if you are a craft person, you know how the lure of a new artistic expression can sneak up and overtake you. I happened to be playing around on YouTube and came across an artist’s channel called The Unexpected Gypsy. Lovely woman from Wales with the most soothing accent of all time! In addition to painting, sketching, etc, she does art journaling. Now, I’ve seen it before, and always thought it looked cool, but never actually tried doing it.
Here’s what drew me:
Do
Yes, if you are a craft person, you know how the lure of a new artistic expression can sneak up and overtake you. I happened to be playing around on YouTube and came across an artist’s channel called The Unexpected Gypsy. Lovely woman from Wales with the most soothing accent of all time! In addition to painting, sketching, etc, she does art journaling. Now, I’ve seen it before, and always thought it looked cool, but never actually tried doing it.
Here’s what drew me:
- It can be as complicated or uncomplicated as you like.
- It can be about anything that interests you…important or unimportant.
- No measurable goals.
- Whatever you create can be added to, covered over, layered until it is transformed into whatever final vision you want.