You’d think after being a parent for 15 years, that I’d know a bit about quality time. But try as I might to “create” quality time, I find the most special of gems come in ways I least expect.
Like in the car. It’s amazing the things kids will talk about while you’re driving down the road. Yeah, the kinds of things that might make you swerve. LOL
About a year ago, my son started taking karate. He fell in love with the sport instantly. I was so proud of him as he moved up through the belt ranks! To see your child, who has never had a passion for anything before, suddenly become eager to workout—well, its great!
And deep down inside, I found it fascinating. I wondered how it would feel to do the moves and attend classes—but I was afraid. I’m a forty year old mother of 2, shaped like a potato with legs. I just knew I’d look stupid in the gee and doing the techniques.
Until January 2015. That’s when I decided it was ridiculous for me to sit and watch class when I needed exercise. So I signed up.
The good news: no one laughed.
The even better news: my son is thrilled. We encouraged each other to practice, compliment each others techniques (my Little Man is a wonderful giver of encouragement), and since I graduated to yellow belt, we’ve begun sparring together.
And we talk—not just about karate. And the drives to and from class, just the two of us, are some of the most special memories I have with him. He can be funny, surprisingly insightful, and inquisitive. It’s been one of the most rewarding activities I’ve done with one of my kids (or even just for myself).
What’s the most rewarding thing you’ve done for yourself? What’s your favorite way to spend time with your kids?
Dani
And deep down inside, I found it fascinating. I wondered how it would feel to do the moves and attend classes—but I was afraid. I’m a forty year old mother of 2, shaped like a potato with legs. I just knew I’d look stupid in the gee and doing the techniques.
Until January 2015. That’s when I decided it was ridiculous for me to sit and watch class when I needed exercise. So I signed up.
The good news: no one laughed.
The even better news: my son is thrilled. We encouraged each other to practice, compliment each others techniques (my Little Man is a wonderful giver of encouragement), and since I graduated to yellow belt, we’ve begun sparring together.
And we talk—not just about karate. And the drives to and from class, just the two of us, are some of the most special memories I have with him. He can be funny, surprisingly insightful, and inquisitive. It’s been one of the most rewarding activities I’ve done with one of my kids (or even just for myself).
What’s the most rewarding thing you’ve done for yourself? What’s your favorite way to spend time with your kids?
Dani
I'm about to embark on a treacherous adventure – one fraught with numerous areas of danger and opportunity for failure. Will I come out the other side triumphant – or not?
I'm instituting a Day of Rest.
I know it sounds melodramatic (well, I am a fiction author, after all), but I really am worried this might be something I can't stick to.
You see, over the past year, I've learned something about myself: I'm a workaholic. I will spend all day on the weekend in front of a computer – the sad thing is, I'm not always writing. As an author, there is always a push to do more in terms of promotion, outreach, and yes, getting more books on the shelves – yesterday, if not sooner.
Don't get me wrong. As an introvert, I'm surprised by how much I enjoy interacting with readers online. Planning special events is so much fun. Heck, even just thinking of things to make you smile, well, makes me smile. But an author’s online presence today can be time-consuming. Add in an Evil Day Job, husband, kids, and cats – not to mention all the characters clamoring for attention in my head… Exhausting.
The perfectionist in me won't let me stop. I'm afraid if I do, I'll never succeed. I'm also a little afraid that if I ever do stop, I won't be able to start again.
There's a problem, though. I'll let you in on an artistic secret: the busier an author is, the more stress and concern on an author’s mind, and those characters?
They Go Silent.
It's an author's worst nightmare. One I've experienced too often lately. Yes, I can push through and get stories to work – but why do that when I can prevent it in the first place?
Sounds easy, right? But I know myself too well. The siren call of the To Do list is loud, all encompassing sometimes. I'll have to build my resistance muscles. So if you don't hear from me on a Sunday, you'll know why.
Do you enforce a regular day of rest? What usually gets in your way? What do you do to "rest" and rejuvenate?
Dani
I know it sounds melodramatic (well, I am a fiction author, after all), but I really am worried this might be something I can't stick to.
You see, over the past year, I've learned something about myself: I'm a workaholic. I will spend all day on the weekend in front of a computer – the sad thing is, I'm not always writing. As an author, there is always a push to do more in terms of promotion, outreach, and yes, getting more books on the shelves – yesterday, if not sooner.
Don't get me wrong. As an introvert, I'm surprised by how much I enjoy interacting with readers online. Planning special events is so much fun. Heck, even just thinking of things to make you smile, well, makes me smile. But an author’s online presence today can be time-consuming. Add in an Evil Day Job, husband, kids, and cats – not to mention all the characters clamoring for attention in my head… Exhausting.
The perfectionist in me won't let me stop. I'm afraid if I do, I'll never succeed. I'm also a little afraid that if I ever do stop, I won't be able to start again.
There's a problem, though. I'll let you in on an artistic secret: the busier an author is, the more stress and concern on an author’s mind, and those characters?
They Go Silent.
It's an author's worst nightmare. One I've experienced too often lately. Yes, I can push through and get stories to work – but why do that when I can prevent it in the first place?
Sounds easy, right? But I know myself too well. The siren call of the To Do list is loud, all encompassing sometimes. I'll have to build my resistance muscles. So if you don't hear from me on a Sunday, you'll know why.
Do you enforce a regular day of rest? What usually gets in your way? What do you do to "rest" and rejuvenate?
Dani
Life lessons are everywhere. I’ve always been a big reader, and enjoy finding inspirational material, whether its in a card, blog post, book, or a song.
There’s a wonderful website for authors run by Kristen Lamb called Warrior Writers. She’s funny, irreverent, and very insightful. Though her posts are aimed at authors, some of them apply to life in general. One I’d love to share with you is her recent 5 Tips for Long-Term Writing Success! Yes, its about writing, but these 5 tips apply to a lot of life’s challenges. Check her out. I promise you’ll enjoy it!
Dani
There’s a wonderful website for authors run by Kristen Lamb called Warrior Writers. She’s funny, irreverent, and very insightful. Though her posts are aimed at authors, some of them apply to life in general. One I’d love to share with you is her recent 5 Tips for Long-Term Writing Success! Yes, its about writing, but these 5 tips apply to a lot of life’s challenges. Check her out. I promise you’ll enjoy it!
Dani
Summer is tough for me—not in the same it was when I was a Stay At Home Mom. Instead of going stir crazy at home with my kids, wondering what they’re doing, how can I arrange for them to have more fun during the summer, and always, always—have I made choices that are shortchanging my kids?
I’m never with them during the weekdays anymore, so I have to ask other people to watch them (which doesn’t always equal fun). I feel guilty for asking other people to take them places, do things with them. When I’m not at the Day Job, I’m trying to write, which is also not fun for them. Though sometimes I take them to things and write while they’re occupied. I try to say “yes” to weekend activities, then feel guilty when I get zero writing done.
Motherhood isn’t just tough, it’s a tug of war.
I never thought I’d resent having to leave someone else with my children every day—I also never understood the guilt that accompanies having no choice but to do that.
What do I give up? Where do I cut back? What does that mean in terms of my writing career? I’m already slow to release my books because of my other obligations.
No one said parenting would be easy. It’s the hardest, most emotional investment I’ve ever made. In the end, the question of whether I’ve made the best choices can’t be answered. Maybe after they’re grown and gone and its too late for me to change anything. But as a counselor friend of mine once said, “The fact that you question yourself makes you a good mother. Some mothers never do.”
What's the biggest thing you question as a mom?
Dani
I’m never with them during the weekdays anymore, so I have to ask other people to watch them (which doesn’t always equal fun). I feel guilty for asking other people to take them places, do things with them. When I’m not at the Day Job, I’m trying to write, which is also not fun for them. Though sometimes I take them to things and write while they’re occupied. I try to say “yes” to weekend activities, then feel guilty when I get zero writing done.
Motherhood isn’t just tough, it’s a tug of war.
I never thought I’d resent having to leave someone else with my children every day—I also never understood the guilt that accompanies having no choice but to do that.
What do I give up? Where do I cut back? What does that mean in terms of my writing career? I’m already slow to release my books because of my other obligations.
No one said parenting would be easy. It’s the hardest, most emotional investment I’ve ever made. In the end, the question of whether I’ve made the best choices can’t be answered. Maybe after they’re grown and gone and its too late for me to change anything. But as a counselor friend of mine once said, “The fact that you question yourself makes you a good mother. Some mothers never do.”
What's the biggest thing you question as a mom?
Dani
Today, as I mourn the start of another round of deprivation (otherwise known as a diet), I give you my list of Top 10 All-Time Favorite Desserts:
1. Krispy Kreme Sour Cream/Hot Glazed donuts
(both are my favorite in their own special way—as my bio will attest)
2. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups
3. Chocolate Chip Bundt Cake
4. Reese’s Peanut Butter Trees
5. My Mama’s Cheesecake
6. Reese’s Peanut Butter Pumpkins
7. Red Velvet Cake with Cream Cheese Icing
8. Reese’s Peanut Butter Eggs
9. Twix Bars
10. Dark Chocolate Anything!
Takeaway: So you can enjoy what I can’t, here’s my Mama’s Cheesecake recipe. Be sure to eat a piece for me!
Dani
QUICK & EASY CHEESECAKE
2-8oz. packages cream cheese (don’t skimp by getting low fat!)
2 eggs
1 cup sugar
4 tsp. vanilla
16 oz. sour cream
2 graham cracker crusts
Use a mixer to combine the cream cheese, eggs, and half of the sugar/vanilla in a bowl. Pour half into each crust and bake for 20 minutes at 350 degrees. Mix sour cream and rest of sugar/vanilla with a spoon. Pour on top of the two pies and bake for 5 minutes at 400 degrees. Refrigerate after cooling.
* Cheesecake photo by Whym (WikiCommons)
Takeaway: So you can enjoy what I can’t, here’s my Mama’s Cheesecake recipe. Be sure to eat a piece for me!
Dani
QUICK & EASY CHEESECAKE
2-8oz. packages cream cheese (don’t skimp by getting low fat!)
2 eggs
1 cup sugar
4 tsp. vanilla
16 oz. sour cream
2 graham cracker crusts
Use a mixer to combine the cream cheese, eggs, and half of the sugar/vanilla in a bowl. Pour half into each crust and bake for 20 minutes at 350 degrees. Mix sour cream and rest of sugar/vanilla with a spoon. Pour on top of the two pies and bake for 5 minutes at 400 degrees. Refrigerate after cooling.
* Cheesecake photo by Whym (WikiCommons)
My sister, author Ella Sheridan, posted a blog that echoed mine from April 7th. (Both posted on the same day, with no collaboration--imagine that!) But if my remarks about perfectionism and balance resonated with you, hers most definitely will. Check out The Yin Yang That is My Life.
*Above picture courtesy of DonkeyHotey on Flickr
*Above picture courtesy of DonkeyHotey on Flickr 
Wow! Can y'all believe its been 15 weeks since we started this little club? Nationals is next week and We Are Ready!
Today, I want to celebrate. Whether you've lost a little or a lot, whether you've posted every week or just followed along, I hope you've been encouraged and reinforced at least 1 thing that will stick with you on your journey to being a healthier person.
This is a hard road, and for those of us on it, its a road that doesn't end at a particular weight number. It continues to weave itself throughout our life's journeys, and that can be a tough realization to face.
But there are things along the way to make me smile -- a pound lost, the realization that I need new (smaller!) clothes for Nationals, a new tip or trick, a new recipe -- but most of all, those special friends you get to meet along the way! Thank you for joining me here every week. I wouldn't have made ANY progress if I hadn't had to check-in and reveal what I had/hadn't done to others.
Challenge: If you want to share your final progress, please do! But I hope you'll share the most important thing you learned over the last 15 weeks.
See you in Atlanta!!!!!
Dani
So many times when we're dieting we focus on what we "can't" eat, and very little notoriety is given to what we CAN.
With my new meds and attempt to balance food, I find I have to have protein, which means meats for dinner. I'm notorious for cooking them until they're dry, because I worry they'll be raw in the middle. (Hubby, on the other hand, is great at it, but not home at dinnertime.) Plus, with a busy lifestyle (day job, kids' activities, writing, a house...), I don't have time to cook at full meal every night.
So today I want to share a quick and easy favorite from our house: mexican chicken. Just throw it in the crockpot (don't forget the slow cooker bag!) and by dinnertime its ready to shred and use for a salad, burritos, tacos, nachos, whatever you heart desires -- as long as you can be bothered to throw it together. :)
Here it is:
3 large bone-in chicken breasts (if you use boneless, add an extra breast)
1 large jar black bean & corn salsa (I prefer the Walmart brand.)
Line your crockpot with a slow cooker bag, add chicken, then pour jar of salsa on top. Set to low heat for 6 hours. Remove chicken from crockpot and shred with a fork. Serve as desired.
See? Easy peasy!
Challenge: What's your favorite "healthy" dish these days?
Dani
Our special guest blogger today is Linda Winstead Jones! As y'all know from her posts, she travels quite a bit, personally and for her writing career. She's sharing her tips for managing food while on the road. Thanks, LJ!
As a writer, I get to live vicariously through my characters. They can have adventure after adventure, and I’m along for the ride. I experience their ups and downs, I feel their pain and their joy. Best of all, all my heroines can have the fabulous metabolism with which I was not blessed.
A shallow thought, I know, but there you go.
Even though I work at home, I end up traveling quite a bit. Conferences, luncheons, the occasional signing, working vacations... It seems there’s always a trip around the corner. Coming up next month, we have the RWA National conference. It’s always so much fun, but dieting on the road is not just a challenge, it’s darn near impossible.
So, what’s a girl who struggles constantly with weight issues to do? How can I enjoy myself without needing to pack pants in two sizes? Here are a few of the travel/diet tips I’ve relied on over the years.
One: Take complete control of one meal a day. For me, it’s breakfast. A protein bar and a couple of cups of black coffee will fill me up, provide some protein to start the day, and comes in at around 200 calories. I might throw in a piece of fruit, depending on the bar and the circumstances. Compare that to a medium latte and a blueberry scone from Starbucks, which will give you around 650 calories and little to no protein. Buying a smoothie? Go in knowing what you’re getting. They can run anywhere from 200 to over 900 calories. Love Cracker Barrel? I do. Their breakfasts come in between 500 and 1200 calories, depending on your choices.
Not only do I save myself calories at the start of the day, getting that good start reminds me all day to be careful about what I choose to eat. And protein bars are easy. Stick a box in your carry-on and you’re set. Have a couple of extras on hand to eat in the airport or on the plane.
Two: Share. When Lori Handeland and I are in NY, we always go to Junior’s. And we always share. We split a meal and a piece of cheesecake. It’s still not what anyone would call a healthy meal, but half an unhealthy meal is better than eating the whole thing. If you don’t have a friend along you can share with, cut the meal in half anyway. I used to feel terrible about “wasting” food, until one day I convinced myself that my stomach is not a garbage can. That’s the alternative, after all. My stomach, or the restaurant garbage can. Cleaning my plate does not affect a single hungry person anywhere in the world in any positive way. If you feel guilty about wasting food, pledge to donate to a local food bank when you get home. It’ll do a lot more good than eating twice as much as you want or need.
Three: Water. I can’t emphasize this one enough. Drink water. Lots of it. Not only will you be well hydrated (a must for flying and staying in a hotel) your body will function better and you won’t mistake thirst for hunger. Going to a party? Alternate cocktails or wine with water. Not only do you save calories, you might save yourself from that embarrassing “I don’t remember dancing on the table” Facebook photo. :-)
Four: Remember the three bite rule. Recently I’ve read that after three bites we’re no longer tasting the food, we’re eating out of habit. A rich dessert? A fabulous appetizer? Take three small bites. Eat slowly. Savor. Enjoy. Then stop.
Five: Ask. While I would never go into a restaurant and make an outrageous special request, asking for salad dressing on the side or steamed vegetables instead of fries is not demanding, and you could easily save yourself hundreds of calories.
It all comes down to taking control. Plan ahead, be prepared, and have a good time.
Share with us some of your favorite tips for eating on the go, and your progress for this week!
Linda's first historical romance was released in 1994, and in the years since she's written in several romance sub-genres under several names. In order of appearance, Linda Winstead; Linda Jones; Linda Winstead Jones; Linda Devlin; and Linda Fallon. She's a six time finalist for the RITA Award and a winner (for Shades of Midnight) in the paranormal category. Most recently she's been writing as Linda Jones in joint projects with Linda Howard, and rereleasing her backlist in ebook format. She can be found at any one of a variety of Facebook pages (search for Linda Winstead Jones and Linda Howard/Linda Jones) and at www.lindawinsteadjones.com .
As a writer, I get to live vicariously through my characters. They can have adventure after adventure, and I’m along for the ride. I experience their ups and downs, I feel their pain and their joy. Best of all, all my heroines can have the fabulous metabolism with which I was not blessed.
A shallow thought, I know, but there you go.
Even though I work at home, I end up traveling quite a bit. Conferences, luncheons, the occasional signing, working vacations... It seems there’s always a trip around the corner. Coming up next month, we have the RWA National conference. It’s always so much fun, but dieting on the road is not just a challenge, it’s darn near impossible.
So, what’s a girl who struggles constantly with weight issues to do? How can I enjoy myself without needing to pack pants in two sizes? Here are a few of the travel/diet tips I’ve relied on over the years.
One: Take complete control of one meal a day. For me, it’s breakfast. A protein bar and a couple of cups of black coffee will fill me up, provide some protein to start the day, and comes in at around 200 calories. I might throw in a piece of fruit, depending on the bar and the circumstances. Compare that to a medium latte and a blueberry scone from Starbucks, which will give you around 650 calories and little to no protein. Buying a smoothie? Go in knowing what you’re getting. They can run anywhere from 200 to over 900 calories. Love Cracker Barrel? I do. Their breakfasts come in between 500 and 1200 calories, depending on your choices.
Not only do I save myself calories at the start of the day, getting that good start reminds me all day to be careful about what I choose to eat. And protein bars are easy. Stick a box in your carry-on and you’re set. Have a couple of extras on hand to eat in the airport or on the plane.
Two: Share. When Lori Handeland and I are in NY, we always go to Junior’s. And we always share. We split a meal and a piece of cheesecake. It’s still not what anyone would call a healthy meal, but half an unhealthy meal is better than eating the whole thing. If you don’t have a friend along you can share with, cut the meal in half anyway. I used to feel terrible about “wasting” food, until one day I convinced myself that my stomach is not a garbage can. That’s the alternative, after all. My stomach, or the restaurant garbage can. Cleaning my plate does not affect a single hungry person anywhere in the world in any positive way. If you feel guilty about wasting food, pledge to donate to a local food bank when you get home. It’ll do a lot more good than eating twice as much as you want or need.
Three: Water. I can’t emphasize this one enough. Drink water. Lots of it. Not only will you be well hydrated (a must for flying and staying in a hotel) your body will function better and you won’t mistake thirst for hunger. Going to a party? Alternate cocktails or wine with water. Not only do you save calories, you might save yourself from that embarrassing “I don’t remember dancing on the table” Facebook photo. :-)
Four: Remember the three bite rule. Recently I’ve read that after three bites we’re no longer tasting the food, we’re eating out of habit. A rich dessert? A fabulous appetizer? Take three small bites. Eat slowly. Savor. Enjoy. Then stop.
Five: Ask. While I would never go into a restaurant and make an outrageous special request, asking for salad dressing on the side or steamed vegetables instead of fries is not demanding, and you could easily save yourself hundreds of calories.
It all comes down to taking control. Plan ahead, be prepared, and have a good time.
Share with us some of your favorite tips for eating on the go, and your progress for this week!
Linda's first historical romance was released in 1994, and in the years since she's written in several romance sub-genres under several names. In order of appearance, Linda Winstead; Linda Jones; Linda Winstead Jones; Linda Devlin; and Linda Fallon. She's a six time finalist for the RITA Award and a winner (for Shades of Midnight) in the paranormal category. Most recently she's been writing as Linda Jones in joint projects with Linda Howard, and rereleasing her backlist in ebook format. She can be found at any one of a variety of Facebook pages (search for Linda Winstead Jones and Linda Howard/Linda Jones) and at www.lindawinsteadjones.com .
While my progress during this challenge hasn't been stellar (still hanging in there are 7 pounds the last time I stepped on the scale), I realized when I made a recent trip to visit family that over the last year and a half I've actually come down 25 pounds total! For someone who had not been able to lose weight the whole 7 years prior to that -- it's incredible!
I knew that my shape was changing. Almost all of my pants are baggy and I can take them off without unbuttoning them. I'm actually going to have to have new pants for Nationals. Not much else has changed, but that bit of encouragement went a long way. Then I went out of town and a few relatives mentioned how good I looked. Nothing like someone who hasn't seen you in a while to notice the difference.
So my progress is slow, but its happening! If I keep trying, I'll eventually reach my goal weight and be able to maintain it because of the changes I've put into place. My point is: if I can do it, you can too! I'm the worst dieter and exerciser in the world. It doesn't take much to beat me. :) So keep trying, keep moving. 1 meal at a time. 1 exercise session at a time. You can do it! I'm sure of it!
Dani
Check in and tell us your progress too!!!!